Why “The Bell Jar” still haunts me…
After almost 6 months of reading it
Sometimes you come across a piece of fiction, which transcends boundaries and definitions of prose, poetry, and biography all at once. And while a lot has been written and discussed about Sylvia Plath´s Bell Jar, here I am, adding my two cents about this piece of prose that connects readers across ages and times and cultural zeitgeist without any dip in relevance. Which makes this small 240-something-page novel a true classic.
Weeks after reading the book, I kept describing it to my friends who read or friends who work in the mental health sphere as, reading someone falling down the rabbit hole of insanity.
I couldn’t find any other way to summarize it. We start with a young Esther beginning an exciting journey. We are with her, as she explores new friendships and we are with her as she introspects and finds herself lacking in one aspect or the other.
We have all had those awkward years or had that very vibrant friend who makes us look dowdy in comparison (don’t we?). There is a certain universality in suddenly feeling inadequate when we move to a bigger pond. And although the novel is famous more so, because it foreshadows the actual descent into depression and the ultimate death of its author. Sylvia told her own story through Esther and hid her fears and insecurities under the guise of Esther. But you can also see your 18-year-old self in Esther. Where most of us, can see past our inadequacies and look forward to gaining knowledge and experience to do better, Esther could only see herself as a negative of the bright and shiny people around her. In the middle of all this, are disastrous dates, and rejection from the course she wanted to take. And in a way, this feeling of… familiarity with her struggles is what makes, shrugging off this story impossible.
How easily, it could have been me, or people I know, whom this story is about.
These are experiences, growing pains that a lot of us have gone through. But somehow our minds could fight this melancholy. It also opens your eyes to the invisible struggles of people around you. It doesn't always take one big traumatic event, to push you into this state. Sometimes it's just everyday things. It makes me still wonder, how similar triggers work in different ways on different people.
There was a projection of an exponential rise in mental illnesses post-pandemic, especially considering the lockdowns and sudden loss of simple freedoms for prolonged periods. And truly enough we saw a rise in generalized anxiety, panic attacks, and depression. And in this world, where we are trying to decipher behaviors much more proactively than ever before, this book presents a unique opportunity of understanding the disease from the inside… not from the perspective of somebody who overcame it, or someone who treats it. It allows us to follow the disease as it intensifies. Every hit the psyche of the protagonist takes is described. And as her view of people around her distorts, it provides a view of the frustrating task of the family and well-wishers, when dealing with a depressed person. Another sad reality to confront was, how sometimes, a particular therapist/Psychiatrist is just not a good fit for you. It was a painful process to see her first treatment session from the eyes of Esther. Knowing subconsciously, that the author succumbed to depression and committed suicide, despite being under treatment for the same, made the reading even more difficult.
I would strongly recommend, the book as mandatory reading for mental health professionals. It can do a world of good, to allow a perspective shift. A person who feels trapped under the bell jar and gasping for air; just needs someone to lift the lid off. Also a wonderful book for student book clubs, who knows how many of us go through, what Esther went through. And if those thoughts could be aired out, instead of being allowed to swirl inside and turn malignant; maybe help could be provided earlier. It is not a book that would change your life, but maybe a book, which could help you see life more clearly.
